Transcript for: “Watermelon Baby, Part I”
1) Coach Fathead: [off] Poet! Please come to my office immediately!
2) Poet: Is there something wrong, coach?
CF: You’ve gotten a girl pregnant.
3) P: Huh?
CF: In accordance with a new countywide program aimed at combating teenage pregnancy, you are one of twenty students at this institution chosen at random to take care of a baby for a week.
4) CF: You will be required to feed it, bathe it, diaper it, and keep it safe. This is your schedule for the next seven days.
5) P: You’re going to give me somebody’s baby?
CF: This is your new baby.
6) P: That’s a watermelon.
CF: It’s a living, breathing baby, and you’d better take good care of it!
7) P: What am I supposed to do for the rest of the period?
CF: Go to the clinic. Your baby is sick.
8.) P: Stupid watermelon. I hope it has AIDS.
Nurse: This baby has whiplash and gonorrhea! What on Earth have you been doing?
None at this time.
April 14th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
The Invisible Life of Poet by Christopher Stetson Wilson is licensed under a
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